Overload And Updates...

An old image from when I was writing The Lost And The Found,
the first crossover story between A Lady's Prerogative and The Butterfly Dragon back in 2015.
Notice Alicia's and Heylyn's old costume and crest?
Also, Mishima Sato has no facial hair despite that being a prominent part of his character.
Nelony was very different at that point too.

There's so much happening in the world today that when we're loaded with pressure, sometimes purposely so, it can be mentally crippling.

Some of us manage to limit what we absorb for lack of a better term, while others like myself often have little choice in that regard, especially when it comes to intentional such effort. After which, we're pressured about that which was piled upon us, and if we break or vent, we're labeled as being complainers or even being negative minded.

Is a kettle that is filled with sewage that boils over when enough heat is applied complaining?

For some people, this sort of treatment of others is simply a social game. Something that certainly affected women for a long time and more and more in the modern world, men too.

Some even feel that it is a form of putting fuel in the old gas tank of those who are less aptly able to conceive of their own concepts and ideas. A little fire under y'er arse to get you going.

Perhaps even an attempt to trick your mind into autopilot, trying to subvert your conscious mind to one of automatic behaviour. A paradigm of action / reaction, where you are more like a machine, simply spitting out canned statements when someone presses the right button.

I don't want to give too much away though because these concepts are very important and will be in something that I've been working on, and very nearly canned as a result of such abuse.

Out walking on my routine to resupply, ie do my shopping and other chores necessary to run my home office, I was certainly attacked in such a way and very nearly decided to can Shhhh! Digital Media for good as a result.

If I did, then however, that would mean that I'm seceding to the abuses of an ideology with whom I do not want to compete, but rather, I'd like to enlighten others so as to enable them to defend themselves against such efforts, benefiting from my own experiences in life and my imagination for ways to convey this knowledge.

So, during my walk, ranting to myself as I went about my business, I very nearly canned Shhhh! Digital Media for good. I have lots of other skills and ideas that would propel Shhhh! Digital in a similar direction in the absence of A Lady's Prerogative or The Butterfly Dragon and the effort to steal or erase those stories from the public consciousness.

They came about in their modern form as the result of the inspiration of people that gave me something important. People from my own life, throughout from a very young age. People from various points in my life whom were enigmatic or inspiring despite how others make such a measure, though most envy of such is the result of poor self esteem on the part of those who'd make such attempts to take one's efforts for their own.

There are many people in my proximity who attempt to withdraw Shhhh! Digital from my ownership and identity, and through smoke and mirrors, make it appear to have originated from someone else, but there are too many things within that certainly make that impossible. Like an intricately woven puzzle whose pieces each can be broken down into an entirely new puzzle of its own, nearly ad infinitum. All those pieces have meaning and significance to someone. Better yet, they ask you to consider the side of another perspective different than your own.

There are those who build. There are those who topple. The best builders integrate balance of form and function, while the best destroyers exploit balance against polarity and rhythm to profit from such destruction. Sometimes to renew and reinvigorate. Sometimes with nothing but greed and malice intent.

 Their perspective might be different, and their stories and narrative would pit such balanced builders as the enemy of humanity or that thwarting progress, or even oppressing the masses. We're all the villains of the other side's narrative and the heroes of our own. 

Do you see it now?

No matter what you do in life, there are always going to be people that congregate together and decide whom their heroes and villains will be. The worst and most damaging of them will elevate their own, while trashing others. I mean quite literally destroying lives in the process. Its unfortunate, and I certainly insist that others set the rules of engagement in such competition and conflict. They should certainly be aware that the means by which they wield and execute their intent will ultimately be the means by which it will be wielded and executed against them.

Abusing others to sort them out between a positive side and a negative side, or a love side and a hate side is hypocrisy. Obviously, if you're subjugating someone by means of social abuse, then you're automatically the abusive side of that fence. I can only speak of this based upon my experience of it, but there are those who'd insist that I'm experiencing someone else's real life situation as if it were my own, but that I'm only imagining it. Such an ideology would then go on to insist that such a person is my one true love, especially if I speak up in their defense as if it were my own experiences. Such an ideology often attempts to force that direction in terms of blood and culture, to favour a specific people as if I were being puppeteered into writing this by one of their membership.

The truth is, that at least four or possibly five of my own (ex) girlfriends in life experienced this sort of thing themselves and it is of them and for them that I am thinking whenever I write in defense against this sort of social treatment, which has gone completely overboard. If on the way to such a defense, it is speaking up for others, then that's a good thing.

However, as I stated, to the other side I'm the villain (or one thereof), while their membership are the heroes. The one thing I've noticed about this "other side" is that they prop their heroes up on the good efforts of their enemies. So there are times when my own words and efforts, are taken from me and accredited to this other side. Especially when they're spoken in the form of narrative for A Lady's Prerogative (here on https://www.shhhhdigital.ca) or The Butterfly Dragon or even Stories From The End. I can assure you that nothing of the sort is the case but this is the age old argument of does life imitate art, or does art imitate life. An issue of control as some see it.

I will attempt to break that down right now, by explaining that the tradition of story telling has existed from humankind's early beginnings. Our first ancestors, often around a campfire would listen to the stories of a Chief or Shaman or senior, someone who'd had experiences and learned much that they could share with the rest of their tribe, as a form of early education. Those stories certainly saved time for the members of the tribe and certainly many lives I'd be willing to bet. What better way to learn theory than to hear the experiences of someone else, without the risk (physical or otherwise) of attempting those activities. So story telling was the first form of education there was. Not necessarily as a form of ego inflation, but that certainly did happen. More so as a form of education and the sharing of knowledge.

We did rely on hunting game long before we learned to cultivate and farm the land, cattle and other livestock. I don't know if you've ever considered the danger that goes into chasing an animal that is nearly eight hundred to a thousand pounds, while you're very nearly naked, and bringing it down with a sharpened stick. One kick from such an animal, and your bones are very possibly broken, in a time I remind you that the most modern form of health care was most probably a wooden splint and twine. No pain killers. Such injuries would certainly have been mortal to most of those who'd suffered them.

A simple story from a hunter who'd brought done such a beast, once or twice, would be more valuable to the livelihood of any tribe than having just one person who knew how to do it. Consider that such big game animals early in our history were most likely the core part of our diet. The reason being that in order to consume enough protein to last for the day, one would have to forage vegetables every single day for ten to twelve hours. Not to mention that after the entire tribe forages all the the vegetables in the area, they'd have to pack up and move somewhere else where it was abundant. That would leave no time to ponder such things as building tools, or have reflections or creative thoughts about one's activities in order to improve them. Twelve hours foraging, possibly eight relocating and the remainder sleeping. All while avoiding other predators.

So it remains that early humankind were meat eaters, and no, this isn't an anti-vegetarian commentary. Its an examination of the facts and reality. Big game animals that were hunted by our tribal ancestors essentially converted the total protein mass of plants and grassing into dense animal protein (mostly muscle and fat), that provided enough protein per unit of mass to allow our time foraging for food to go from twelve to fourteen hours a day, down to two to four hours a day. Consider that one such big game animal would also provide other resources as well in addition to food sustenance.

The most important point is that we acquired something so precious, that it allowed us to blossom into the dominant species on the planet. Our time. That time became what we used to develop tools and techniques to increase the efficiency of our own survival, from which we gained more time, better living conditions and better health. Story telling was an essential part of that journey to get us from there to where we are now. Story telling expanded to become every artform that we have ever known. Simply to express: we were here, we did this, this is how we did it and this is what we learned from it. 

Almost genetic in a way don't you think? Not in the sense of being privy to any one species of humanity, but rather, a form of ancestral knowledge that could transcend what is shared via genetics and be shared with everyone who could understand the stories. I hunger for knowledge and want to learn. The yearning and the learning.

That isn't even the tip of the iceberg of what I am trying to say with A Lady's Prerogative or the Butterfly Dragon, but it certainly is an important aspect of the concept. We are all the villains of the other side's stories, while we're the heroes of our own. Some of us hunger for knowledge and want to learn ie the yearning and the learning.

Perhaps the biggest aspect of this has to do with mirrors, for many abusive and often narcissistic people regard others exactly in that way. An artist is just a reflection of everyone and everything around them. Nothing more. Hence, there are those who become obsessed with seeing themselves reflected in the words and actions of others. As if having an impact, positive or negative or otherwise upon someone else validates their own existence. A form of power, albeit a flawed and self obsessed form thereof.

There are those who believe that they can burden screenwriters, authors, actors, directors and other story tellers, and many other fixtures of the public eye, infrastructure and society, and many of those who've been cast out into the cold, impoverished or homeless in such a way that they simply reflect the people who burdened them. Anyone who expresses and has something to say to the world.

That what they create simply becomes a form of proxy penance in the absence of the kind of people who get their thrills by seeing others reflect their sins and struggles and remember that I state that as an Atheist that leans towards Buddhism and Taoism with all due respect to peoples of other beliefs, which is often much less than I'm afforded.

In history, many women have also been subjected to this sort of thing. Simply being burdened to the point that their attempt to vent or even exonerate themselves, is seen as nothing more than the reflections of those who burdened them so or as complaining. Once again, a form of social narcissism that targeted women.

Perhaps complaining is actually protest, that something of this nature is actually occurring. Like the symptoms of a social illness, that attacks those who then vent this, leading the astute to observe that there is a social phenomenon going on that is indicative of a social sickness in terms of attitude or treatment of others. Some of those who perpetrate it even becoming addicted to it as much so as anyone with substance abuse issues, if not even more.

So, is that the reflection you see in me today? Were those of you that attacked me considering these things while you were doing so? Were they a part of your consideration of others in the fabric of this reality? Probably not. If that was, you wouldn't have done it. Then, we can only assume that this is me, my family, my friends and those who've inspired me to such thoughts over the course of my life. 

Perhaps even my empathy for those who suffer the same.

So, to put it into context. I'm going alter a poem I wrote years ago, back in 2002:

I am a mirror, so please do note
If you see happiness, that is your coat
If you see joy, its your joy too
for I reflect what is in you.

I am myself, my own to be.
I may put myself to your sea.
So I may know, how you feel
but still within, I am real.

When you're too full, your ego's fool
To validate yourself, making others your tool
To see your reflection, Narcisse in flesh
I'm the voice of what you fear the most.

The truth about yourself.

And for the rest, you might see
The worlds I write, the you in me.
There within my worlds so free.
The gravity of what you might be.

A passion for living, a heart for life.
A source of the weave, absent of strife.
All in all, there within.
The one thing that is certain.

The truth about yourself.

Shhhh! Digital Media will be back, possibly tonight though as I stated, I nearly threw it all away after the stress of what I experienced today. Especially at the hand of those who simply want to see the reflection of themselves in the aftermath of having burdened and tormented many others, and certainly myself. Having had many tastes of that, am did what was right, or write if you prefer.

There are many others in this world who are suffering a great deal as a result of means that are truly no fault of their own. Why on this Aerth would you spend so much effort subjecting others to treatment of this kind when you could instead be affecting those who need the help so positively? Without using that as some form of bifurcation to separate us into the positive and the negative. The uplifters and the complainers?

I will see you soon most likely with more updates. Whatever I work on will become the top post in terms of date and time. I won't say what it is, but it will be something worth the wait. Thank you once again to my loyal readers, those who aren't a part of the identity thieving/swapping sponsorship/extortion cult. Also, to those of a more inspired existence, happy holidays!

Here's a couple of pictures of me below. Wearing what I wore today, mask on and off.

Brian Joseph Johns

I'm 6 feet tall by the way and weigh about 170 - 175 lbs.